I'm the real me

Yeah, I'm slow to warm up to people.
Seeing others who can talk naturally with people, who always can bring up topic when with strangers, I envy them. Meanwhile, I am wary with strangers and usually don't reveal myself much. By strangers, it can also be someone I see every day but don't have much interaction.

Yeah, I may be an over-positive person.
I always look at the positive side of a person, believing that every person has a Buddha inside the heart. I try to put myself in their shoes, thinking from their point of view, considering their circumstances. (Sometimes I wonder, is this considered as helping them to find an excuse for some "unacceptable" behaviour? ("Unacceptable" is "" because everyone's interpretation of unacceptable is different. What I think is unacceptable may be acceptable to others) )

But then, people always ask:
Why are you so 慢热? (which means slow to warm up to people)
Why are you so positive and trusting?

DON'T YOU PEOPLE KNOW THAT THIS TWO IS A CONTRADICTING BEHAVIOUR??!!!!
HOW CAN I BE VERY AMIABLE AND SOCIABLE WHILE BEING CAUTIOUS ABOUT PEOPLE AND ALWAYS THINKING ABOUT THE NEGATIVE SIDE OF PEOPLE??!!!
ISN'T THIS CALLED A PRETENTIOUS PEOPLE??

Well, I know I also a contradictory person, being positive and trusting, yet slow to warm up to people. But then, this is because I know that we can't be friends with everyone. Humans are meant to be made up of many, many, many circles of people who can connect with each other. Why should I force myself to be so many versions of me just to fit in every circle??!!!

For me, I'm more comfortable of being a positive and trusting yet 慢热 person.
Instead of being a pretentious person, acting friendly to everyone but in the mind, keep thinking bad about everyone. Life is already so hard, why make it harder for yourself by having all those negative thoughts in your mind????

By the way, where can I find a job where everyone is just concentrating about how to make the organisation better or how to improve work flow? I'm fed up of working where people are calculative of any extra work load. (YOU DON'T WANT TO TAKE UP EXTRA WORK LOAD, BUT THEN WHEN SOMEONE IS WILLING TO DO IT AND THE BOSS IS WILLING TO GIVE MORE RESPONSIBILITY TO THIS PERSON, YOU FEEL JEALOUS AND SAY THAT THE BOSS IS PRACTISING FAVOURITISM!!!)
I'm thinking, is working in an NGO will have lesser chance of meeting such people?

DeeJay thinks it's really time to change job...

《微微一笑很倾城》·观后感

感触最深的，是当微微和二喜发生矛盾，微微 “离家出走” 的那一刻。。

其实真的觉得，每个人都有各自的特长和缺点。一班固定的朋友圈当中，可能确实会有几个比较出众，但如果是真心把对方当成朋友的，就肯定不会去介意、去比较的。那点小事，根本都不会放在眼里，连在脑海里闪过的机会都没有。为什么呢？因为真是好朋友的话，会了解对方哪里不好，可以很轻松自在地互相调侃，就算是优点也好，也会特地酸一下他们。

还好微微和二喜和好了。经得起风波的友情，必定会更加坚固。看她们恢复以前互相调侃的关系，感觉真的非常好啊！好朋友，是什么？就是拿来互相调侃的嘛，生活乐趣啊~

想对那些感觉朋友比自己优秀的人说：
其实优秀的他，是非常珍惜及欣慰有你这样的朋友的。能够自由自在地相处，畅所欲言。你也有他没有的优点，互相弥补、互相学习，把对方当成进步的榜样，然后大家一起进步，不是很好吗？

 想对那些被认为是比较优秀的人说：
不要觉得自己很孤单，一定会有那么几个真心待你的朋友。只要谦虚，自己真心待人，过得了自己的良心，日久见人心，一定会找到那一班朋友的。

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至于肖奈和微微的感情戏呢。。哎，偶像剧，真的是害了许多人对爱情的憧憬啊。。现实生活哪有那么美好，大家多多少少都会有一些需要磨合的地方的。要拿一盆冷水淋自己一下，提醒自己：“清醒吧，别中了偶像剧的毒啊！！” （不果还真是挺浪漫的，不禁会幻想一下自己会是通过怎样的方式认识我的那另一半呢？XD）

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孟逸然、娜娜、爱香奈儿, 小雨妖妖等等那一半女生呢。。看多了，真是怕会被她们影响呢。。还是远离为妙啊。。 真是怕自己会被他们影响，以后在生活里变成 “以小人之心度君子之腹” 的人。要训练自己成为不八卦，守口如瓶的人，真的需要很强的自制能力。

好久没有用华语写作了。看了 《微微一笑》，提醒了我，华语是可以如此地厉害，可以 “温柔” 地 “杀” 了人，也可以委婉地替人解围。（就像肖奈在舞会时跟风腾的董事长说的那段话，仔细一听，才听出里面的含义。）

华文真是深奥啊，一辈子都学不完的。要练一练了，以免生疏。

懒惰

懒惰，懒人。
我是个懒人。

懒惰，不一定指在动作上懒惰；思想上也绝对可以懒惰。
终于发现原来，我不是因为麻木了，或对人与人之间的复杂小情绪比较迟钝；而是因为懒惰。
懒惰去想、懒惰去在意、懒惰去复杂化、懒惰去计较。
只要想着：人非圣贤，人人都有好与坏的一面，他就是他，只要去接受就好了，反正也轮不到我来改。
可能就是这样，会让蛮多人说我容易迁就人。。
总之就是一个字：懒！
没别的了，就这样。

我也不是什么神仙，也知道我其实没大家说的那么好。
怎么了？难道就不可以有人懒惰去猜疑别人吗？
我就是这样啊。何必浪费我的脑细胞去想这些没有意义的事呢？倒不如把时间花在做我喜欢做的东西~

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最近发生了一件事。。
部门会议时，两位senior 当着我面前直接向manager 表示她们的不满，说 manager 比较偏心我，对我比较好，肯教我很多东西，而其他人只是做死工。
虽然场面有点尴尬，但当着大家面前说出来也好，至少不是在背后。至少这是我认为的。有一位朋友则觉得她们这样做不应该。
其实我也觉得 manager 也有点偏心。她只对她喜欢的人好。虽然 senior 们也不喜欢她，但至少工作上要公私分明嘛。而且我还蛮敬佩我们的两个 senior 的。她们敢说敢言，哪像我，只会埋头苦干。
一方面又还蛮高兴，因为有机会学习不一样的东西。但至少 manager 应该做到每个人都教，每个人都分享知识，而不是知识对我而已。。。

唉。。。。。。算了吧，懒得理了。。。。。继续埋头苦干去。。。。

回到中学·回到初衷

Went back to CHS with Khai to watch CHS 60th anniversary concert ——《情牵60大汇演》。(P.S. Just learned the meaning of 汇演：各地或各单位的文艺节目集中起来，单独或同台演出。具有汇报、互相学习、交流经验的作用。)

We were really flooded with lots of emotion... Especially that, what are we doing all these years after graduated? Watching them, full of passion, talent, creativity, and determination; standing on the stage, what have we done after started working? Work life is so boring, not even challenging our brain and creativity... And work life kinda sucks, since the day I was told about the office politics...

Actually everyone is just being themselves, we all have our longs and shorts, no need to mind too much. This is what I've believed all this while and keep reminding myself to keep believing. No one is really that bad to purposely harm another. But is that really it in this wide world? I have started to doubt myself...

Going back to high school, really felt like going back to my roots and able to stand firmly on the ground again. Watching the students actively selling their things for their clubs, I can really feel their passion and youth. Being young is so good! Like Khai said, did we give out the aura of hope too when we were in their age? XD

I was captivated by their performances on the stage——drums, Kelab Kebudayaan dances, alumni's medley of songs mixed with our school song, brass band's "When The Saints Go Marching In", 华乐, Harmonica & Guitar, Symphony group's "Viva la Vida" and "Smooth Criminal" (with the experience of us being in the center when they surrounded us and performed right in front of us), choir, and the last combination of all! Their standard is certainly not lower than 文娱! Everyone is so talented.

Will be going back for CHS Guides and Scouts' campfire on 16th July and CHS 60th anniversary carnival on 31st July.

Happy birthday, CHS! Thanks for the good memories, and good training ground for us to challenge our mind.

DeeJay thinks that she is able to lead life positively again 

for a long while after recharging herself~ :)

The Eternal Child in Our Heart

It has been 9 years... 9 years has passed. At first when I looked at this sitting arrangement, I almost cannot find myself in it, the memory is so vague. Then when I looked at my friends' comments, I felt that, "Ah, it has been really long. Some of them are even kept inside my memory's drawer, all dusty already."

But looking at them commenting about each other, well, looks like there are still bits and pieces of memories kept by everyone. The child who was sitting in that place in that year is still there in our heart. No matter how many years have passed and how many things that we have experienced that changed us throughout the years, but we still have a common intersection in our lives.

DeeJay feels that it is really great to be in contact with the friends after so many years.

Added on 23rd Feb 2015 (Mon), 11.33 pm: 

After watching 《爸爸去哪儿2》，I can feel that my inner child is rekindled! :DD Feel more energised when doing things, and more energised in every footstep. 

After knowing that there are spiteful people posting negative comments of the children, I feel that the people are the ones with low EQ （情商）and IQ （智商）. Come on, they are kids, what do you expect? When you were small, maybe you weren't even as capable as they are!

All the children are beautiful -- Feynman with his glowing eyes when he chose Gary instead of his father; Yang Yang Yang with his gentleman-helpful and sensitive heart; Bei Er with her bright attitude; Duo Duo who is adorable and so cute; Joe and Grace who are a pair of loving brother and sister. They are the ones whom we have something to learn from. 

Review of "Cheongdamdong Alice"

A very typical story of Cinderella meeting a Prince. But, instead of a really romantic story, this drama brings out the realistic side of human.

Whenever we heard some gossips of a girl dating or married with a rich guy, we may have the perception that it is not true love. But what is true love? We as human can't really control our mind, and we also have many characters in one body. The part that love the person is us; the part that love the person even more because of his rich background, is also us. But who is it to judge that it is not true love?

Besides that, this drama also gives an insight of the hardships faced by poor people, especially in this new era that people will judge you by your outer appearance. I can feel the frustration and despair of poor people who have worked hard for all their lives, but are still stuck in the realm of poverty. Of course, we have heard the stories of rich business people starting up from poor background, but this also depends on various favourable factors - which we refer to as "天时、地利、人和" in Mandarin. For those who didn't possess the luck, they still have to work hard every day just to be able to live on.

____________________________________________________________

By the way, I've been thinking, maybe I will be single for my whole life... I'm quite enjoying my single life at the moment - able to do anything and go anywhere I want, able to socialise with anyone. This song explains my feelings a lot...

28.05.2014

人行道的铃声响起，催促人们赶紧过马路。

短短的30秒，我却忍不住拿出手机，拍下这一刻。

天气虽然昏暗，但仍然遮掩不了放工了的兴奋感！！

^.^

中学走向大学：一步一脚印 ~ ~ ~

如果说中学让我第一次有了一批好死党，
那么大学让我学习了怎样跟异性自在地相处。

如果说中学让我学习了人际关系，
那么大学让我学习了领导能力。

如果说中学让我培养了少许信心，
那么大学巩固了我的自信，也提高了我的勇气。
（例如：要在大庭广众中说话，就算只是想把捡到的东西物归原主，这也够我练了近 10 年，从中学到大学，才真正有信心自己能做到。）

如果说中学让我找到了兴趣，
那么大学就让我找到了梦想。

如果说中学让我找到了朋友和同志，
那么大学让我找到了自己。

如果说中学是我的生命真正的起点，
那么大学就是。。。Hmm, 这个还没想到。

总之，生命中的每一个阶段，都能带给自己不一样的领悟。

一步一脚印，

为回忆作记号。

《Miracle in Cell No. 7》

Never has there been a movie which made me cry like this movie did!!!!!!

Really worth watching! Instead of saying it's a touching movie, I'll rather say it's a heart-breaking movie. T.T

It's so weird. Even though the characters inside seemed so positive and trying to lead their lives optimistically, but these are the parts where I cried the most. The characters were smiling, but I sort of can feel their sufferings and cried instead. And when they finally broke down, I cried even more! 

Tears overflowing like waterfall. T.T 

Now I understand why my roommate cried that much when she was watching. She is the one who introduced this movie to me. Really thanks to her for introducing such a meaningful movie to me!

Love the little girl. Her expressions are so natural and cute! 

And the love between the father and daughter... T.T

Lastly, APPRECIATE every person who is important to you! TREASURE every moment that you spend with them!

RoJaK 感想

拥有健康久了，

会慢慢忽略了它，

不再重视它。

偶尔生病一场，

提醒着我们它的存在。

三

犹如塞翁失马，

病后才知福。

雨过天晴后，

要更惜福、满足！！！

终于知道为什么Saujana 的两栋宿舍都要让同一性别的人住了。试想想，当没有巴士时，又不能通过 M03 这个捷径上 M04，到底是该走 Restu cafe 那里上呢，还是直接爬山上去？唉，两条路都费时费力啊~ ~

好喜欢 M04 哦！晚上夜景美~ 晒的衣服也有阳光的味道~ 换衣也不必拉窗帘~ XP 

真希望第四年时能够换来这里！！

看到一间间家户都装饰着各种花式、各种颜色的小小电灯泡，多美啊！他们在布置时的心情，肯定是很开心的，因为要迎接新一年了。看到办公室里也有布置，让我想象着大伙儿布置时的心情和气氛~~

我选对职业了！果然，实习才能真正用到所学到的东西。Audit 就好像做数学那样，解不开时，头脑就好像全部血管打结了，很无奈、无助。但是一旦解开了，就会感受到一股满足感！然后又再继续解开另一个结去~~
Audit 跟 Sales 差很多。。Sales 做不好，可以怪罪于消费者的喜好变化，也不会影响别人，最多影响自己拿不到 commission 而已； 可是 Audit 就不同了。任何一小部分弄错，肯定是你的错，不能怪罪于任何人。而且影响可能会很大呢！
可是 Audit 还蛮难的。很有挑战性，责任重大，而且有期限的压力！


年初八了。哇！从 M04 的楼梯口，可以一览各式各样的烟花！让我不由自主地会心一笑呢！:D

 一卡在手

通行自由

I own Penang!

Wahahahaha!